The Things You Hate The Most...

[Kinoulton]

They've just brought out ANOTHER advert of those disgusting loathsome hideous vomit-inducing laughing babies.

Surely amongst the 999 useless channels available by satellite, there must be one that could be dedicated to people who actually want to hear the little snot dispensers going "goo goo hoo hoo ha ha iggle piggle whoop!"

[cornish tigress]

Quite like the farting gas one. I think it is hard wired that giggling babies and farting make you laugh.

[Kinoulton]

The Blazing Saddles farting sequence was a brilliant piece of cinematic history.

Laughing babies just make that voice in my head tell me to go out and kill.

I'm off now. See you all in the morning.

[POSTIGER]

I've never liked getting up......

[POSTIGER]

In the morning, I mean

[Bill W (2)]

In the morning, I mean

Getting up at night is OK?

[POSTIGER]

If I'm able to get up in the evening or even in the afternoon then i'm a happy man - it's specifically mornings I don't like.

[Bill W (2)]

If I'm able to get up in the evening or even in the afternoon then i'm a happy man - it's specifically mornings I don't like.

Must be something to do with your metabolism. Or who arouses you.

[madoqua]

Its 0232 and I'm up.

One of my three pussies is also up.

[Rizzo]

I'm with Postiger - only my dislike is getting up when it's dark in the mornings. If it's bright and sunny it's not so bad

[Bill W (2)]

Its 0232 and I'm up.

One of my three pussies is also up.

Three pussies is greedy!

[Kinoulton]

I look after three pussies.

One's ginger, one's black, and one's a little bit grey.

Guess which is my favourite? (The one I feed first.)

[Bill W (2)]

I look after three pussies.

One's ginger, one's black, and one's a little bit grey.

Guess which is my favourite? (The one I feed first.)

You have a favourite pussy Kinny?

Has to be the ginger one!

[Kinoulton]

Not a word to the missus.

Back on topic, those blank blank call centres that have auto-dial machines that phone you. Either you answer and there is no fekker there, or you answer to be greeted by someone who can't pronounce your name and sounds like they are speaking through a faulty handset in the middle of a busy railway station.

A faint "Herrarr? Herrarr? Iss that missussarr Die-harr Leeverinkerssarr?"

As I work at home, my phone is a vital tool, and I hate these hourly interruptions. Now when I answer the call I don't even cut them off. I just put the handset to one side. I find the sound of some distant voice going "Herrarr! Herrarr!" quite soothing, as it's their money they're wasting and not mine.

[Rizzo]

People who park so close to your car in the supermarket, and at such an angle, that you simply cannot open the door enough to get in on the driver's side. I've just had to scramble across from the passenger side to be able to drive my car away.