Tigers's Den Part II, The Singing Cludgie

Cornish Tiger · Post by **Cornish Tiger** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 7:43 am

Management are making me open at 7.30am. And I have to wear this maid's outfit and roller skates. Ho hum.

The special offer of the day is TsingTao with a sprig of beansprout stuffed down the neck.

Help me.

wills_#1fan! · Post by **wills_#1fan!** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 9:19 am

im sure the punters wont mind the maids outfit!

Or is that not helpful?

Cornish Tiger · Post by **Cornish Tiger** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 9:22 am

Thanks Wills No1. It's the roller skates I'm having real trouble with.

Certainly Pam. We have Aribacariba-ariba and super dooper frothy cappucino with choc sprinkles ...

...(or I could get the bottle of nescafe out me handbag if you like?)

Sherpa2 · Post by **Sherpa2** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 10:30 am

I knew it, thngs are getting off to a terrible start - Coffee - COFFEE - in the Singing Cludgie - whatever next.

TC, the little white apron thingy is supposed to be at the front (nice though :D )

Any chance of a pint of Adnaams? I got one of those freeby peanuts stuck in my throat along side the sprig of beansprout.

Smells way to fresh in here, where's Gate :?:

WharfedaleTiger · Post by **WharfedaleTiger** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 10:33 am

Hey, give me back my pub!

Cornish Tiger · Post by **Cornish Tiger** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 11:08 am

Sherpa2 wrote: the little white apron thingy is supposed to be at the front (nice though :D )

Oh, thanks. It was a bit draughty. :oops: Especially at speed. Weeee!

Best clean up a bit. Miss Thirmaston 1953 due any minute. I'm all a flutter.

Sorry, Adnaams is on the floor next to the tray, Sherps. Mind the glass. I'll get another.

Sherpa2 · Post by **Sherpa2** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 11:45 am

Thank god your here Wharfy, CT's making me dizzy, time for you to stamp your mark on the new place.

Heard Miss Thirmaston 1953 is quite a big gal these days, might have to do the opening ceremony on the street, CT will never be able to navigate around her on those skates!

Kinoulton · Post by **Kinoulton** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 12:05 pm

Look, will you skate over here and sort this food out?

Snake & Pigmy pie should come with chips and gravy only. I do not require the grated raw carrot, carved radish, slice of lemon, cress, coleslaw, kettle crisps, or pineapple ring.

And what do I want with a jug of red wine and mustard jus on a doilly?

And Spud says his bitter tastes like gnat's wazz.

Cornish Tiger · Post by **Cornish Tiger** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 12:15 pm

I'm just following company policy, sir. This is now a bizarre pointless salad theme pub.

Unless we all rise against this deadful tyranny!

I've got to pop to the hospital now and see if they can do something with my broken nose. Smacked into Tsing Tao and beansprout at quite high speed.

Kinoulton · Post by **Kinoulton** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 12:27 pm

Well we're off to the Spit & Sawdust.

Spud says the Pedigree's ready for tapping and the meat growlers are nice and hot.

WharfedaleTiger · Post by **WharfedaleTiger** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 2:35 pm

Right then, we'd better getstarted, lets get a bar going, pull all the beer through, install the pumps... so much to do...so muhc to drink...

anyway, I'll just go and install the new, imrpoved loo.

DCat · Post by **DCat** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 3:01 pm

Radishes?

Might I strongly advise getting rid of them before Gate gets here. We do want the cludgie to last more than one evening!

Kinoulton · Post by **Kinoulton** » Thu Feb 15, 2007 3:04 pm

Better get a move on. The Spit & Sawdust have really thrown own the gauntlet. It's marvellous in here.

Real Ale is £1 a pint until 7pm, the barmaids' hemlines have risen another two inches, wall to wall TVs showing 24 hour sport, and there are three types of sandwich: strong cheddar, strong chedr with Branston, and strong cheddar with strong onion.

By the way, sorry about the stain on your chrome bar rail. Spud had a protest wazz on his way out.