Tigers's Den Part II, The Singing Cludgie

Rizzo · Post by **Rizzo** » Wed Mar 07, 2007 5:10 pm

Good evening, I'm from the Inspectorate of the Misuse of the Apostrophe, sub-department Moronic Spelling.

I would like to see the Proprietor of this Establishment immediately.

You have won the Jade Goody Memorial Trophy for services to Pub Lingo. :bluesmile:

DCat · Post by **DCat** » Wed Mar 07, 2007 5:18 pm

Quite right too - I'm the inspector who is following up (FU for short)

While I'm here, though, if I can be bribed with some imaginative imbibement (don't report me for making words up!) then I will ignore all abused apostrophes.

Kinoulton · Post by **Kinoulton** » Wed Mar 07, 2007 6:07 pm

It's a fair cop, Guv.

For years we had a landlady who wrote just like that.

Famously she would round off her promotional posters with "Come long enjoy self."

She also had an embarassingly public list of people who were allowed to pass cheques at the bar. This included:
Brian & Chell, Tong Di, Suzy Lime Kill.

It took us a while to work out who the heck she meant.

Cornish Tiger · Post by **Cornish Tiger** » Thu Mar 08, 2007 3:11 pm

It's my birthday! Free drinks on the house courtesy of the management. That is OK isn't it Wharfey?

Sherpa2 · Post by **Sherpa2** » Thu Mar 08, 2007 3:46 pm

Happy Birthday CT, I'll take a pint for each of your 21 years since Wharfy's paying
:pint:

Cornish Tiger · Post by **Cornish Tiger** » Thu Mar 08, 2007 3:53 pm

:besot: You charmer! Or did you mean a pint for every 21 years? That'd be 2 and a bit pints sadly!

wills_#1fan! · Post by **wills_#1fan!** » Thu Mar 08, 2007 4:25 pm

WooHoo!!

Happy Birthday miss Barmaid!!!

Pint for me too if Wharfey is paying!
In fact, put me a couple in... i like to abuse the landlord hehe

Thats what he thinks of it though

Kinoulton · Post by **Kinoulton** » Thu Mar 08, 2007 5:56 pm

Happy Birthday.

Bolly all round. My shout.

And I made some canapes: Brie & Strawberry; Smoked Mackerel & Horseradish; Prawn & Philedelphia; Ardennes Pate & Grape.

Will someone knock the pub cat off the table please. He's eying up the Mackerel.

Rizzo · Post by **Rizzo** » Thu Mar 08, 2007 8:49 pm

Can't Spud deal with the pub cat? I'd have thought it would be right up his street!

DCat · Post by **DCat** » Thu Mar 08, 2007 10:55 pm

Happy Birthday CT - us Pisceans must stick together!

Mackerel & horseradish? Don't let Gate near those!

Pint for me as well please

Gate · Post by **Gate** » Fri Mar 09, 2007 8:00 am

I'm not allowed horseradish or any of those gusset-ripper comestibles since I forswore trouser-coughing for Lent. Have to say I'm looking forward to the Easter menu:

*Antipasti di peparami con mostarda di Cremona e Branstoni
*Jerusalem artichoke and horseradish soup
*Chicken Tonight a la Wow Wow Sauce with pommes Lyonnaise, roasted shallots, puree de pois "marrowfat" and devilled Savoy cabbage
*Dr Pepper sorbet
*Cheeseboard "whifferoni" style with Munster, Stilton, Camembert, Limburger and spring onion crackers

All washed down with the finest Burton ales. That should produce some fine Bass notes.

Perhaps we should revive the "Good Old Days" entertainment theme for Easter with ":censored: by Gaslight"? I still have the asbestos crinoline somewhere.

Kinoulton · Post by **Kinoulton** » Fri Mar 09, 2007 8:22 am

What a menu! I was at Sandhurt this weekend, and that's just the sort of tucker they intend to give our boys before they go into battle.

Ah, the stench of war. Those Johnny foreigners don't like it up 'em, you know.

Only trouble is, that food does play havoc with the Highland Regiments. Some of them have taken to sewing lead weights into the hems of their kilts to keep them from billowing up.

DCat · Post by **DCat** » Fri Mar 09, 2007 9:33 am

Gate

Don't forget the 'Stinking Bishop'. I took some of that home on the bus once - I had the whole of the back half to myself!

Kinoulton · Post by **Kinoulton** » Sun Mar 11, 2007 10:47 am

I know it's Sunday but will someone get the bar open please? I'm off to Point To Point and it's actually illegal to be at a Point To Point meeting whilst sober.

I hope they've got a TV with Sky somewhere.

Sherpa2 · Post by **Sherpa2** » Sun Mar 11, 2007 10:54 am

Kinny, if you let us know your route perhaps we can get Wharfey to break out the mobile broadcast and bar unit - if the wheels are still on it that is.

Better have a pint while we get that sorted, please barmaid.